"It seemed like the perfect dream. I spent so much time capturing it, I forgot to experience it. Even with a second chance... I still lost it." David Mulhern
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©2001 david mulhern

Bright blue sky. The world is so real. The stables are almost above my head. The floor of the stables is eye level. I'm in what seems like a muddy troth. There are so many pigs.

Someone is pushing their shit over me. Onto me. I can feel it in my mouth. Everywhere. It's covering my face. I feel in my pocket... something strange. It's my eye drops. It seems funny to me, I imagine their contaminated.

Covered in pig shit, I walk on. I come to a school. I can't open my eyes. I have to walk into the girl's bathroom. The audience is wondering who I am... who I will reveal myself to be. Even I'm curious.

I wash my face and see myself in the mirror. I'm disappointed and disgusted at myself. It's just me.

I keep washing.

I think about staying in the bathroom. Hiding there.

Suddenly I see the door closing. I walk out of the bathroom. There is two girls standing there. "See!" One says to the other.

I try to explain why I was in there. "I couldn't see..." I keep walking. Their accusations are following me.

I stand in a line with other students. It's dark in this building. There are windows letting in a little bit of the light from outside.

I hear one of the other students in line mention Stone.

I walk up the small flight stairs and I see David Stone. He was sitting at a booth with a little kid. I realize that David must work at the school. He seems unhappy to see me but he fake smiles...

He is going to walk me out. Up until this point, I found it very hard to walk. As we're leaving things are breaking. I'm breaking everything.

We get to the front door. "I've already broken this." I say to him. The door is off it's hinges, completely destroyed. I realize he must think I'm saying his school is old, in a way.

Outside, there is a huge canvas draped around the school. It looks strange.

I keep walking.

I have to capture everything. Trying to make the perfect connection between the silver recorder and a device... I had to capture this. This was the perfect dream. I have to live it again to remember it.

The room was warm. The colors were so vibrant, so orange. There were large windows with the crimson drapes drawn. This was the second time this was going to happen. It was so clear to me. I knew I could never forget this dream, especially now with a second chance at capturing it.

There were two beds. On the one on the right was a guy and a girl kissing. I thought I was the guy... Then, another guy comes in and takes the girl to the other bed. I'm now that guy.

We are having sex and with a blue flash a child is born. Quickly, doctors rush into the room. They say the child is a mogwai. Everyone starts freaking out...

I'm rushed in to the shower immediately to be cleaned. It is so bad that it's a mogwai. She comes into the shower, but she looks evil so I leave.

The police are coming... I run into another room. It's the entryway to a house. There is a white wooden door behind me that I'm trying to lock. The policewoman is able to open the door.

"Hold on.." I say. She lets me lock the door again. It's as if this is all a rehearsal. It's so strange. It's as if I'm allowed to live the dream again simply to be able to remember it. I lock the door.

There are windows in front of me. Wooden shutters closed. I know that I'm supposed to leave now. I climb through the windows. Two kids are watching me...

As I leave, the buildings get further behind me. I end up at this lake... it's so perfect. This is where the world stops. It's the seam of the world. It looks like a painting. The seam of the world rippling in the water. The colors, so vibrant.

I start walking into the lake. There is a man and his dog coming towards me. I know that I'm supposed to interact with them in some way... this is the second time this has happened.

But I don't.

I keep walking through this lake, leaving the dream behind.

The lake is so shallow. I can stand up the whole way through it. I remember thinking, this is it... This is it. This is your masterpiece. This is the perfect dream. All you have to do now is capture it.

On the other side, sitting on a rock, is this black guy. I remember feeling bad because he gets up as I arrive. His peace is broken. He was just relaxing...

With my tongue, in the back of my mouth, I'm pushing my tooth. I push the tooth really hard. It moves easily with my tongue. I push harder.

The tooth breaks into pieces. Two of them fall into my hand. One falls to the ground. Lost in the pebbles and the water.

I look at the tooth closely.

I realized this was all a distraction. I couldn't remember the dream...

it was lost forever.

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