"Standing in the parking lot, at the end, it was horrible... but waking up was worse." David Mulhern
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©2001 david mulhern

she was not beautiful, at first, in my eyes. we met in a basement of sorts. i could tell by looking at her that she had book smarts. we talked for a while, and joked, and had fun. she made me laugh. she made me happy. at one point we were in a store, and i knew i had actually laughed out loud... in my bed in the real world, and i was surprised that this dream was able to carry over to that point.

the joke? something about getting a class ring with a gopher eating a lion on it. it was funny.

anyway, so the relationship continues... everything was great, and i knew i couldn't have a physical relationship with this girl, it would ruin the friendship. but somehow, it happened. we had kissed or something.

we went to this place. a dark bar-type place. with lots of stairs or something, as we walked out the doors i ran into dan dickson, he was coming inside. he didn't say anything, but he saw me with her. at first i was embarrassed, as to whether or not she looked physically good enough, then i stopped and looked at her and realized she was beautiful. and she was crying. it was mostly about our relationship. everything was going good until we had kissed. she wanted more i think. she was happy, sad, confused. it had become convoluted.

we walked by a jacuzzi. there was one of her friends in it, from a long time ago. he looked like his name could have been Jeremy, or something. he touched her ass, jokingly, completely innocent. as a friend would. 

i faked kicking him in the face with my boot, and made some sound effect. then i realized, everything i did was a joke. so i really jumped down, and slammed his face into the bottom of the pool. she kind of smiled, and walked off. his face, around his lip, started turning black. a dark circle quickly formed. i was afraid it would bruise like that. the circle disappeared, and came back. i collected my things (shoes and pants and such) from the corner. "Jeremy's" friend and him were talking about the incident while i walked away. they were surprised, confused.

i walked out to the parking lot i thought she had gone to. but i couldn't find her. i thought back to when we had first met. i missed her. how she used to be. i never saw her again. 

i woke up, and realized she'd never really existed at all.

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