"I woke up feeling very good and felt like I had somehow gotten an opportunity to reach some closure with my Father-in-law. The last evening that I had spent with Lynn before he took off for Oceanside had not been a real pleasant evening but like every evening we always kept it civil between us and we shook hands before he left. I remember telling him to have a safe trip and I'd see him when he got back in the fall. I also remember that I felt the time away would be good for both of us. That was the last time I spoke to him and that's why the dream was special to me. I knew that I had to write it down and then put it on this site." Comments Continue...
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©2001 david mulhern

 

 

My Father-in-law, Lynn, was a man that always tried to improve things. Whether it was his house, car, boat, motor home or even a toaster...he'd modify it in some way to make it better.

In the dream I was talking to Lynn and he asked me to come out and see what he had done to his pool. I remember thinking in the dream that Lynn had a nice pool already and I couldn't imagine what he could do to make it better. 

When we went out to the backyard (which was landscaped like a tropical garden) I couldn't believe what he had done. 

One end of the pool was your typical swimming pool with tiles and a plaster bottom. As you went around the pool the plaster turned to dirt and the pool turned into a pond with frogs and lily pads and crystal clear water all the way to the bottom. It had fish in it and looked so inviting. He had built it into the house so that when you went into the lower level you could see into the pond from the bedrooms and the hall.

I couldn't believe how nice it was and I dove in and swam around. I noticed through the glass that in the lower level I could see a car in the hall. I got out of the water and went to the lower level and looked at the car and realized that it had been there when Lynn did the construction and it was now trapped. 

I went up and told Lynn in front of everyone that he had forgotten to drive the car out before he enclosed the pool in glass. 

He came to the lower level and realized that I was right. He was kind of frowning and rubbing his head. I saw a door at the other end of the hall and told him that maybe we could widen the door and get the car out. He went to the door and looked at it but didn't say a thing. He had mentioned earlier to me that his son, Brad, had done the work but he wasn't there at this moment. He just continued to frown.

Next I was in a bedroom with my wife Liz and in the room was Lynn, standing in one corner of the room and in the other corner was Lela his wife sitting in a chair with a young girl sitting on the chair's arm. 

I was talking to Liz and I heard Lynn say something very softly, kind of sad but I didn't catch what he said. I was not really listening to him. He said it again a little louder and I remember that it kind of registered but I still didn't catch it. All I knew is that he had said the same thing that he said the first time but I was focused on Liz, Lela and the young girl in the chair. 

He said it again. This time I looked at him although he wasn't looking at me he was kind of looking lost and sad and saying in a calm voice, "Why do you always have to point out the flaws?"

Everyone in the room heard him the last time and there was complete silence. I felt like everyone (except Lynn) was looking at me and I felt embarrassed.

He didn't say a thing and I remember that Liz was in agreement with her dad that I seemed to enjoy pointing out flaws of other people. I thought to myself, "That's hypocritical because now Lynn was pointing out my flaw." Before I could say that another thought came into my mind, "Look how hard it is for Lynn to say that, and look how easy it was for me to point out his flaw." That thought prompted me to say, "Your right Lynn...I do have a problem and from now on I will work on it." I had sincerely meant what I said and everyone in the room realized it. I got out of the bed and walked over to the young girl sitting on the arm of the chair. It was obvious that she was the owner of the car that was stuck in the hall and I said to her, "Do you need a ride home?"

At that comment everyone laughed because it was obvious. I looked at Lynn and he was smiling at me because he realized that it had been hard for me to admit my flaw and I was trying to use humor to ease the situation. 

It wasn't in his nature to point out flaws and yet he had pointed out my flaw risking that I may accuse him of doing the same thing that he accused me of. 

It had been a risk that he was willing to take and it had worked out because I had accepted what he had to say (which was seldom the case in real life).

"I need to explain what brought about this dream. This last week my wife and I went to San Diego, CA for a long weekend. We were staying in Oceanside at a friend's beach house and since they weren't going to be in until the next day we decided to go into town for dinner. After dinner we went to the Oceanside pier and walked out to the end of the pier and watched the sun go down. As we were walking back to the car we noticed an RV Park called "Paradise by the Sea". We both realized that was the RV Park that my Father-in-law, Lynn , had been at when he had a fatal heart attack two years ago. The night before he passed away he and my Mother-in-law, Lela, had walked out on a pier by the RV Park and watched the sun go down. He woke up the next morning and while he was sipping his coffee and looking at the ocean he passed away (not a bad way to go when you consider all the options). For the first time we associated that pier with the story that Lela told us about Lynn's last night." Dick Mulhern

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Date: 06.29.01

Locations: Lynn's house in hawaii

Characters:
Me, my father-in-law, and others

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